Dating

About “Staying in a relationship for the wrong reasons”

Being in a relationship for the wrong reasons is a drag. A loving, committed, supportive relationship is one of the best feelings on Earth. That only works if you’re there because your heart is in the right place. Although we might not realize it sometimes, many of us are staying in a relationship for the wrong reasons. And if you’re not in a relationship for the pure reasons of love and happiness, you might quickly find that you either get bored and exhausted of it, or the relationship just ends anyway.

Through the drama, the thrill, the chemistry, relationships grow and the infatuation stages fades. What’s left is love and happiness if it’s all pure, otherwise you’re left with the wrong reasons keeping you tied to your partner.

Money

Sometimes people get into relationships for the money, and walking away from the relationship means leaving the money. If you are staying with someone, sometimes you might be splitting bills so that financial burden is shared. You have to honor yourself and your own happiness because if you stay in the wrong relationship for a silly reason like money, then you’re going to become stuck in your life

Skin

A good physical connection is hard to walk away from, but it shouldn’t be the only reason you stay in a relationship. Hormones are getting the most of you at this point. Sometimes you have a great bedroom connection but that is not enough if the rest of the relationship is stale. Cookies and Pipes don’t mean everything.

Because they apologize

Just because someone apologizes for their bad behavior doesn’t mean they deserve your forgiveness. “Sorry I slipped and cheated” doesn’t take back the fact that they did. Know where to draw the line. Apologies without behavior change mean nothing.

History

If you’ve spent a year or more with someone, you might find yourself tempted to stay in the relationship because of the history. Never stay in a relationship just because of how much time you’ve invested in it already. It doesn’t matter if you’ve put in a year, or five years, or even 20 years, if you aren’t seeing a way to work things out so that you’ll be happy then you’re always free to leave.

Friends and family

Family and friends tend to form pretty strong opinions about people that you date, and they always claim that their thoughts and feelings are in your best interest.  That does not mean they should control whether you stay or leave a relationship. Remember, your relationship is yours not a community project. Vuka.

Superficial Qualities

If you find yourself in a relationship mostly because you like the really superficial qualities about your partner (their looks, their bicep size, their apartment, their car), you are on your highway to…. ( whatever that songs says) . Point is you’re headed for doom. Superficial qualities don’t make a relationship work and can only sustain you for so long before it all falls apart

2 Comments

  • seedofathena

    I think fear of the unknown is another credible reason. You’ve built your whole life around this person and you have no idea what living without them looks like.

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