• Creative Content

    Untitled/Unfinished 2

    Fine wine with a dash of cyanide I chose you still Unorthodox stupidity but who needs a brain anyways? Calculated doses of the drug I chose, Y.O.U Kryptonite laced kisses, I’ll still dine you to my grave You, Only you, can ruin and build me Unsettling feeling, ain’t it? Now it’s my turn to ruin you, are you ready ? F.U.C.K Y.O.U, she said poetically. *** I found the note pinned to the door with a knife I had left on the sink earlier that day. My fiance was still in the car, cocooned in her innocence, blind to my past life. This was the second note that week. The…

  • Creative Content,  Mind of a boyfriend

    Untitled/Unfinished #01

    She is the reason for all this. She is to blame. Her and her stupid beautiful mouth. I can’t even insult her right. I need to leave her. If I didn’t know her I’d say she is trying to change me. 28 years of conditioning, heartbreak, lies, and ZBC cannot be kissed away that easily. Nothing she says will make me go to church. Never. Well not after everything I’ve seen her church elders and sisters do. Ntando, you know it’s time! “, she barks as if I’d move, her bite is mind-numbing so imagine what her bark does. All I can think about is ripping her ridiculous praise team…

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    Am I Yours , Truly?

    This is a response to yours Truly by MaMo MaMo, Our union has been nothing short of amazing but maybe it belongs in the past because it has been tense for a while now. I do apologize for using your emotions as a crutch for some time . We were so in love, I failed to realize you loved me more than I deserved. I’ve taken you for granted in so many ways and the guilt becomes heavier to burden. My masculine toxicity doesn’t justify how distant and nonchalant I was when you needed my affection. I can’t keep doing this to you and our beautiful daughter. The man you…

  • Creative Content,  Mind of a boyfriend

    How to get over your ex

    How to get over your ex sounds too ambitious. Let’s go with how to detox them instead. It’s a process and it’s not an easy one. A lot goes into it especially if the relationship was a long one. But it can be done, small steps. Clear your chest When you do break up, there are a lot of emotions flying around. Those could be hurt, anger, disappointment, whatever they are, resolve them. The final talk you have with them should be the only closure you need. Depending on the circumstances of the break up, get ‘why’ answered. Then accept that it didn’t work out. ( Don’t blame yourself if…

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    Dates – Boyfriend thoughts

    Thoughts that stay hidden. I actually agreed to this? Man! This is really stupid, I sabotaged myself here. But if it makes her happy, then I’m happy. Uhh, that’s not even comforting… I need a beer. Or 2. Why don’t I do that instead? Then I’d get dumbed… Pull it together. Brain… Focus. Date. Ideas. Somewhere quiet. Great food. And definitely where I don’t know people. Damn, what if I meet my ex. Or my friend’s girlfriend. Do I tell the gents about this date before or after? They will have a field day of laughter. Who cares, I’ll have a good time. And laugh at the next person. Brain.…

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    Ishuu !

    “Stop being a girl”, Malume barked at me, his aura reeked of disappointment. Showing emotions as a man was equivalent to castration in his reality. I needed to cry my pain out. The burden of supressing the fire burning my soul was harder than accepting my new reality. I was single again. Rejected by the one woman who understood the combination to my heart’s rhythmic beats. Frankly speaking, I should have handled my situation better after all she was pregnant. With someone’s child. My best friend, Jack. Malume was hell bent on unleashing his past life demons and beating Jack to a pulp. I don’t blame him, I would have…

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    Umjolo, The Dating : Part 4

    Umjolo, The Buhlungus The air was as light as my head then. My anxiety was screaming as loud as Bosso fans, this was it. The plan was going my way. Nothing ever went my way which made me uneasy. Life had a thing of showing me none of my plans mattered. The true life of a Zimbabwean boyfriend. I mean if everything were up to me I would have been home enjoying my boyfriend allowance. Probably expecting my weekly data top up from Fia. But here I was, on my way to confront her. My only consolation was YV was with me the whole way. Never trust exs. That’s the…

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    Umjolo, The Dating : Part 3

    Umjolo, The Pandemic ” Ezinkulu ! You’re here to take her home” One of the police officers at the station shrieked. The bearded hero nodded, he never said a word. Mysterious. Maybe he had no teeth. I was really hoping he had no teeth to even the competition. Ashuu ! This man was the “don’t worry about him” incarnation. He was everything I wanted to be. Rich, powerful enough to steal ladies and a beard. He must have had a very handsome pocket to be noticed by the police. Or he was famous. Maybe both. That take her home part stuck. I felt my heart shred into many pieces. Whose…

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    Umjolo ,The dating: Part 2

    Dating in Bulawayo is a community project. Extreme sports. There I was hand in hand with my ex facing Sofia’s bestfriend. Her weapon of mass destruction, umakhalekhukhwini the phone,  tightly gripped in her left hand and on her right car keys. I could see her Twitter happy fingers twitching. My girlfriend, u ‘Dear Santa’ was going to be fed false information. Once a story is on Twitter, no one cares about the truth. The truth is boring anyways. Imagine if Vovo knew lunch was paid using my girlfriend’s money.  Tinashe, affectionately known as Honda Fit Driver stood there facing us. My relationship was over kanjalo nje. This  woman hated me…

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    Umjolo, The Dating: Part 1

    *Phone beeped “Dear Mdali, please let it be an ecocash text !”, I lamented in anguish. Umjombo is a whole different type of buhlungus. Understand this ,being broke on it’s own is bearable-nyana but being a broke boyfriend is a whole 6 feet of the pits. Harare water I tell you bandla. That wasn’t the day. The gods of umjolo had finally answered my prayers. It was a message from Mukuru. A whole Mukuru message bazalwane. Free pass and free money, my day was made. Sofia had outdone herself this time. I was impressed. It’s not everyday you get boyfriend allowance. Her hair business was booming. And for some odd…

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